Deepest thoughts of
SCORPRIA...
around
3:46 am
I am a girl...
...and i just love being one!
Speaking for a moment for all girls, it is understandable when one of us say "i hate being a girl!"...understandable that one (or many) situation or the other at that moment made her say that. What i just dont understand is why guys perk up immediately and say "yea, being a guy is much better!" If you ask me, being a guy is always better...but only for guys; and being a girl is best...but only for girls! If one of us were to ever get a chance to be the other one, i'm sure it'd be hell.
I grew up to very supportive and broad-minded parents and an adoring, adorable elder brother. Like a girl (am not using ‘typical’ as a prefix, since I feel there’s nothing ‘typical’ about girls!), I used to be weepy and shy. Then I slowly grew up to be a tom boy—all my friends were actually my brother’s friends; the games I played with them were all cricket, wrestling-in-the-mud, war-ga
mes and all typical Indian games that boys usually play. Then I grew up again to be a girls-only type! For almost 4-5 years, I never had a single friend of the male type! And again, back to a mixed crowd I jumped…and became hugely popular with guys again…this time, mine own friends, along with my brother’s.
In spite of all this, I still remained a girl…and even when I’m in the midst of guys, I’m a girl by myself…I am not sad I cant talk about cars or cricket—I have a goldfish’s brain for these things, apart from many other ;) …I’ve never learnt to drive (feel ashamed when my mom makes fun, but am thankful I don’t get sent to shop after shop to buy stuff for the house :D) and to answer one of the popular mails floating around, I’m not sad I cant jump into a pool wearing a white shirt…that I cant jump into a pool wearing no shirt…that I cant pee anywhere on the road…that I cant pee while I’m standing…buf!! but still, I love being a girl…and I love everything about being a girl…being who I am…
Am not a feminist…I hate that genre and drear to think of being one. I don’t think guys are chauvinists…its just that they are proud of being guys—and just don’t realise that we re proud to be girls ourselves!! Am I making any sense at all? Ok, here’s why I’m writing this…
A friend spoke to me a few days back…and when I told him I had decided to take a break from work for a while and go home, he told me “look, don’t be a fool and act like a girl. You are not just a girl, you are more than that”!! Hello, now do you want me to do specifics and prove that I happen to be a girl? The “more than that” part is appreciated, thank you; but what about the “not just a girl”? I really don’t understand why guys think it’s a compliment to tell a girl “you are not just a girl/don’t act like a girl” Act??? Did you actually use that word??
I had barely come over it when, while out shopping (I had bought one dress from an outlet and was heading towards the next) another friend asks “why are you behaving like other girls? (implying that I’m ‘different’!) Do you have to go to more than one shop to buy a couple of shirts??”. Dude, if you got a problem, head home…I can shop without you!!
Now what is all this? What do “other girls” do?
• Weep when they are sad? Despair over a snub? • Cry when in pain? • Enjoy the rain? And the wind and the smell after that? • Take more than 30 minutes to buy 4 shirts? And go to more than one shop for that? • Prefer books over sports? Generally? • Giggle over silly jokes? • Giggle over no joke? • Like stuffed toys? • Keep a diary and write in it?
Well I also do all these things…and crazier stuff than this…call me unpredictable; call me eccentric; call me a girl…but please don’t call me “different” and don’t ask my why I behave like a girl! The answer is right in your face, dodo!!
And yea: if you find the way girls behave to be funny, get yourself tested…maybe you really dont know the difference between the genders. By the way, we don’t think guys behave funny! Period.
I grew up to very supportive and broad-minded parents and an adoring, adorable elder brother. Like a girl (am not using ‘typical’ as a prefix, since I feel there’s nothing ‘typical’ about girls!), I used to be weepy and shy. Then I slowly grew up to be a tom boy—all my friends were actually my brother’s friends; the games I played with them were all cricket, wrestling-in-the-mud, war-ga
mes and all typical Indian games that boys usually play. Then I grew up again to be a girls-only type! For almost 4-5 years, I never had a single friend of the male type! And again, back to a mixed crowd I jumped…and became hugely popular with guys again…this time, mine own friends, along with my brother’s.In spite of all this, I still remained a girl…and even when I’m in the midst of guys, I’m a girl by myself…I am not sad I cant talk about cars or cricket—I have a goldfish’s brain for these things, apart from many other ;) …I’ve never learnt to drive (feel ashamed when my mom makes fun, but am thankful I don’t get sent to shop after shop to buy stuff for the house :D) and to answer one of the popular mails floating around, I’m not sad I cant jump into a pool wearing a white shirt…that I cant jump into a pool wearing no shirt…that I cant pee anywhere on the road…that I cant pee while I’m standing…buf!! but still, I love being a girl…and I love everything about being a girl…being who I am…
Am not a feminist…I hate that genre and drear to think of being one. I don’t think guys are chauvinists…its just that they are proud of being guys—and just don’t realise that we re proud to be girls ourselves!! Am I making any sense at all? Ok, here’s why I’m writing this…
A friend spoke to me a few days back…and when I told him I had decided to take a break from work for a while and go home, he told me “look, don’t be a fool and act like a girl. You are not just a girl, you are more than that”!! Hello, now do you want me to do specifics and prove that I happen to be a girl? The “more than that” part is appreciated, thank you; but what about the “not just a girl”? I really don’t understand why guys think it’s a compliment to tell a girl “you are not just a girl/don’t act like a girl” Act??? Did you actually use that word??
I had barely come over it when, while out shopping (I had bought one dress from an outlet and was heading towards the next) another friend asks “why are you behaving like other girls? (implying that I’m ‘different’!) Do you have to go to more than one shop to buy a couple of shirts??”. Dude, if you got a problem, head home…I can shop without you!!
Now what is all this? What do “other girls” do?
• Weep when they are sad? Despair over a snub? • Cry when in pain? • Enjoy the rain? And the wind and the smell after that? • Take more than 30 minutes to buy 4 shirts? And go to more than one shop for that? • Prefer books over sports? Generally? • Giggle over silly jokes? • Giggle over no joke? • Like stuffed toys? • Keep a diary and write in it?
Well I also do all these things…and crazier stuff than this…call me unpredictable; call me eccentric; call me a girl…but please don’t call me “different” and don’t ask my why I behave like a girl! The answer is right in your face, dodo!!
And yea: if you find the way girls behave to be funny, get yourself tested…maybe you really dont know the difference between the genders. By the way, we don’t think guys behave funny! Period.
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It is said that for a hero to raise,there should be a villain.The hero [or should i say heroine ;) ] will be more elegant and powerful when the villain also is powerful. So let me introduce you to that villain;'me' :)
I really liked the blog, not only cos it has points which I believe to the core but also because I was the benefactor of it. :)
It was and sometimes is a practice in the Indian culture, that guys are the earning members and gals are just the 'chefs' 'baby sitters' and 'obedient wife' and they need not work and the guys work for earning the livelihood. Time is changing, and women are coming upfront to take new positions and responsibilities. It is something that I respect and appreciate to my core. So now come to my statement
“look, don’t be a fool and act like a girl. You are not just a girl, you are more than that”!! .
The girl I mentioned here is the girl who resigns her job, and goes home to serve her husband... WTF. I hate that idea.If a girl considers her job to be an important one for her future family and believes that she has to be a earning member of the family, I cant believe that the girl will resign from the current job, it is putting a break in her career and do u think any interviewer will take it as a good sign that "oh, I tght i needed a break before my family decides me to get me married." ? Isnt she going to unknown future where she is solely dependent on her family and husband. [ Please note that I didn't know she was not taking a long leave, mind u. I assumed she was resigning when she said she is taking a break just like she took a break from job in trivandrum. :P ].
So when she said she is taking a break, what will I think? that the one girl whom I have so much respect for her values and ideologies is becoming just one another of those 'home-makers' ? and I am supposed to keep mum. Sorry ladies and gentlemen, I love her, care about her and wants her to reach for the skies. Whatever decision which is to jeopardize that will invite sharp rebukes from me.
signing off
MC :)
Thanks Mannsurya! I appreciate the concern...and i (now) understand and respect the context in which yu commented on my actions...
but the post also refers to certain others who said the same thing (without the feelings you haad while yu commented)...its for all those ppl...and for all those who say the likes of these as a throw-away comment to the multitude of self-respecting girls around :)
And a huge thanks again for 'motivating' me tu come bac to the blog world! i missed it so much! and now, i'm back!
I respect your audacity in the first para. If girls don’t behave like girls, then who will? Boys won’t. Atleast I won’t! Those who want to step onto others shoe are always welcome, but then we call them by another name. Let me add a word of caution. If someone asks you to behave “like a girl” then the only problem I see here is – the world is less safe and secure for girls as compared to boys. We can go on arguing equality of rights and all the crap, but the truth is truth. I would never let my daughter to travel alone in the night, but I might allow my son. I know it’s unfair, but I have no other option. For the sake of equality, the most I could do is not to allow my son to travel alone in the night, but that doesn’t solve the problem.
The following comments could be a male-chauvinistic one, but I don’t care because that’s what I feel. Being a mother means a lot more to a lady than what being a father means to a man. It is how the nature has programmed the life cycle. Even if you look at the case of animals, its the mom which is the "homemaker" while fathers do the "protection" and "food collection" part - there are exceptions but this is what I quickly recollect from Nat Geo programs. Having said that, we humans are different and need not always go back to the animal kingdom for advice. But the job of homemaking and taking care of children is highly enjoyed by some women. I remember Kajol having a very similar opinion even by being one of the most successful actress bollywood has ever seen. She is now more of a homemaker and does films very selectively. I do respect these women. Equally do I respect women who want to make out a career - either for their self-satisfaction or to add income to the family. If we can avoid the “compulsion” part and let the women decide for herself, then I have no problems.
Which one? Blossoms, Bubbles or Buttercup? hehe...
You even know the names?? incredible, coz ive never seen a single episode of tht thing :D...and woah ! yu used tht word!!
couldnt help but notice how many times u repeated " amma should quit work"
u know whar , i used to think so too , coz in school or somewhere there always used to be some people who would look with pity- ness & say " oh!! her mom is working" . being a rebel as a kid i would always remind mom that she should quit work too , that she wasnt there for us etc etc , now i wish that i had never uttered such things ! am so proud that my mom , didnt while away her life ,also setting a good example for me in turn :)